Are you a parent that thinks sending the kids out to the garden for a bit of playtime is just a way of keeping them occupied? Well, new research shows there’s a lot more to playing than just passing the time after school and on weekends.

The new study from the British Toy and Hobby Association and Play England shows that children who don’t regularly play may face behavioural and social problems later in life, with research revealing that a lack of play can negatively impact on children’s communication skills and self confidence. What’s more it can also make it harder for them to make friends as they grow up.

But in an age where the computer and TV are easy options for parents looking to amuse their children and with kids often not used to amusing themselves with more traditional play and games – what is the answer?

Jeff Brazier, who is all too familiar with the pressures of being a work dad, knows how difficult it can be to find the time and inspiration to create fun games and playtime with his kids. He also knows how important it is to let kids develop their own creativity and imagination through play.

So if you’re a parent looking for   help and ideas for positive play and for great things to do as a family, then log on to our live Web TV Show where Jeff and play expert Dr. Amanda Gummer will give you the confidence to get your kids back to basics when it comes to playtime.

Jeff Brazier and Dr. Amanda Gummer join us live online on Tuesday 17th May at 10am to discuss great ideas for playtime.

For more information visit www.btha.co.uk

H: Lis Speight

A: Jeff Brazier, celebrity dad

B: Dr Amanda Gummer, psychologist and play expert

H: Are our children becoming part of a robot generation who don’t know how to interact with others? Today we’re looking at research by the British Toy and Hobby Association and Play England which highlights the possible long-term effects of a lack of play on our children

Titles

H: Hello and welcome to Studio Talk, I’m Lis Speight. Play experts are warning that our children could end up lacking social and creative skills if they’re not encouraged to regularly play with others. Coming up on the show today: celebrity dad Jeff Brazier with his tips on playing with the family. Research from the British Toy and Hobby Association and Play England – what does it all mean? And all your questions about play and its importance to our children will be answered live. Well joining me here in the studio are TV presenter and celebrity dad Jeff Brazier and Dr Amanda Gummer who is a psychologist and play expert. Jeff and Amanda, welcome to Studio Talk, really nice to see you today. Now this is a live show and we’ll be answering your questions throughout the program, so if you have any questions or comments please use the box on your screen, click send and we’ll do our best to tackle them over the course of the show. And if you’re Tweeting whilst watching the show please use the # tag Studio Talk. Now let’s kick-off by talking to Jeff a little bit first, really great to see you today, you’re a single dad so you’ve made time to come and spend time with us, dragged yourself away from your children, you’ve got two boys haven’t you?

A: Yes and they’re 6 and 8 so basically they’re at school

H: Oh ok

A: Which gives me the time to go and do my work in school hours if possible, but not always the case

H: And how do you find the time to play with your children, because single dad, you’ve got a lot to do haven’t you?

A: What’s great about this Making Time to Play Campaign is it’s made me kind of have a little look at how much I play with the children. I mean it’s all well and good them coming home from school, my rule is always to get them to do their homework first, so between 4 and 5 that’s the homework taken care of. With that done, you know because obviously they’ve got the incentive of playtime afterwards, usually it helps get it done quicker. Afterwards I’m sometimes guilty of going and maybe doing a few jobs around the house – obviously you need to cook dinner and get that ready

H: You don’t need to feel guilty about cooking the dinner, that’s good – new man

A: No but you kind of have a look at it and you think well why don’t - that hour should be playtime – an hour a day they say keeps the doctor away, this sort of thing, you’ve got to look at it, it keeps the kids very happy because since being involved in the Make Time to Play campaign I\'ve actually noticed how much happier the children are and more excitable when I say right what game would you like to play? So the weather’s good, we’re out, we’re on our cycles, we can play football out in the street, or if the weather’s not so good then we’ll sit in and we’ll play board games, they love hide and seek, there’s a million different games that we can play and they just love the fact that I\'m sitting there playing it with them, so it’s been quite – quite a turnaround. I do it quite a lot but you know every day I\'ve been regular with it and I\'ve just seen how much happier it makes them

H: Yes. But dragging the kids away from the telly and the computer games, I mean that’s all kids seem to want to do, is to watch the telly – what are your sort of top tips for parents that are having trouble actually saying to the kids right, telly off- let’s do some family time, let’s have some family games

A: Well the telly doesn’t go on, I mean during homework obviously if the telly’s on it’s a distraction, and we only really put the telly on if, you know they’re particularly tired one day or –

H: After school they are tired at the end of the day aren’t they?

A: They are a bit knackered, that’s again another reason why you get your homework done first, but kids are never too tired for playtime, I don’t know whether you’ve noticed that or not, as parents yourselves?

H: That’s a lovely phrase

A: So we get straight into the playtime and like I say they just perk up nicely, then again that also wears them out a little bit more so when I want to put them to bed at 8 o’clock they’re a little bit more ready for it than what they were if they\'d sat around not really doing anything and computer games – every now and again – we’re not strangers to Dance Central on the X Box, I\'m not going to lie, we love a little bit of that, because it’s active, you know there’s something in – there’s a bit of exercise for them as well as having fun which is the most important thing

H: Yes. And what do your kids most like to do, if they had a favourite thing what do you think it would be?

A: Kids particularly like – well I made up a game last night for example, so we’ve got these old alphabet cards which are obviously for when you’re learning your alphabet, my kids are way past that, but what we do now is sort of adapt a few different games that we’ve played in the past, and I\'ll put down the card and say if it’s a B I\'ll ask them a question, it will be “name a football team beginning with –“ so they have to be switched on and they’re playing a little quiz amongst each other. But you can make a game out of anything

H: That’s so simple, it doesn’t cost very much money either which is another thing

A: It doesn’t, another example when you’re in the car as well and you’re sitting there and you especially love it when there’s a taxi driver in the car too because they like to get him to play, but it will just be where we say right boys, we’re going to do animals and we’re going to go through the alphabet so we’ll take it in turns – a, b, c, d – keep going round, keep going round and you know they’re learning but they’re sort of being occupied, you know – it’s really easy to do actually, you just have to kind of feel creative and have the confidence to say right boys, this is what we’re going to do now. But that’s what they’re looking for you in the parent

H: He’s good isn’t he Amanda, he’s very good

B: He is

H: So how important is it for our children to be interacting with others, rather than just sort of playing on their own or sitting in front of the telly?

B: Oh it’s incredibly important. If you don’t interact with others you lose the kind of social skills, talking to each other, communicating your feelings, negotiating, compromise, team work – all of those sort of soft skills that you need for later on in life. They’re all things that you do – that you need to do well in a job, and they’re all things that you get from playing with other kids. You don’t get it if you’re playing on your own and you actually don’t get it that much if you’re – if you’ve got adults supervising you, you need to be playing with peers as well, you know quality time with parents is really important but it’s not the only time for play, and parents shouldn’t feel bad about giving themselves a break so that they can make the dinner or whatever, and letting the kids just play

H: Yes and if you haven’t got any siblings though what do you do? I’ve got an only child, we’ve got a dog now which is a bit of a bonus so she plays with her as well, but if you are an only child what do you do then?

B: Playdates, you know meet parents at school, invite the kids round for tea, and then you get the benefit of a reciprocal arrangement so when you’ve got something you need to do you’ve got somebody who you feel safe having their kid and likewise

A: WE like reciprocal arrangements

H: Yes exactly. Good – palm them off on someone else for an afternoon which is great because you do need time to yourself don’t you at the end of the day?

B: Absolutely

A: It’s being organised isn’t it? I find it’s good to have a plan and like what you’re saying about when kids are obviously playing by themselves, it’s good sometimes for you as a parent when you’re choosing what dinner they’re going to have that evening, choose what game they’re going to play as well, have it sat out ready, the boxes on the floor and they’ll go to it and they’ll take it from there won’t they?

H: Yes and it is fun for the parents because some parents see it as a bit of a chore, and it’s not at all, it’s really good fun because they’re your kids at the end of the day aren’t they?

B: Yes I mean if it feels like a chore you’re not quite getting it

A: In the spirit of things

B: Yes and it’s habit-forming, the more you do the more you enjoy it and the more you see the benefits the more you want to do it, and sometimes it can take a bit of a nudge to get – oh I really could do with just sitting down and finishing this email or whatever, but actually let’s give them some time. But I think the kids really benefit if you’re giving them time, give them your undivided attention, if you’ve got stuff to do, set them up with some play, get them playing, chuck them outside in the garden or whatever it is or out with friends and then get your stuff done so that when you’re with them, they don’t feel that you’re not really there

H: Yes you’re sort of half a parent, yes

A: Well you’re inspiring confidence, creativity, imagination when they’re out playing with their friends, social skills – it’s part of our job

B: Yes

A: It’s not just play, you know to them it’s fun and it’s play but to us you’ve actually got to kind of look at it it’s your job to put that in front of them and to encourage them

B: Yes and parents sometimes struggle with ideas and there’ a Facebook page for the Make Time to Play campaign, it’s got some really good ideas and one of my favourites is taking kids outside with a brush and a pot of water and painting a wall or a fence because it’s mess-free, kids don’t – you know it dries. If it’s wet we have a suggestion on the Facebook page for somebody taking food colouring and putting different coloured puddles and just playing

H: Oh ok

B: And a teacher I used to work with said there’s no such thing as wrong weather, it’s just wrong clothes, so the kids don’t mind being outside

H: They love it don’t they?

B: Yes they really don’t mind

H: And as long as you’ve got an anorak with a good hood there’s no excuse really is there, we’ve got to get out there. It’s good for us as well to get some fresh air isn’t it? But people do worry don’t they in this day and age about sending their kids outside, sort of stranger danger thing – is this just a problem with this generation of children do you think or I mean is this a new situation or is this something that we kind of dreamed up?

B: Stranger danger is no more dangerous or prevalent now than it ever has been. It’s media hyped so that people are more aware of it but actually the sort of the nasty men who might take children away – you’re no more likely to be abducted now than you ever were. I think the only real fear is traffic and you know cars are made safer so they protect the passengers so people drive faster which is harder for kids, but there are ways round that too, so you know safe playgrounds, there’s more play areas and actually encouraging kids to play with each other in fields and woods and beaches and even in just a sort of safe, closed off street

H: Yes. So do you think this is something we’ve got to take on as parents then really, that we’ve got to let our kids go a little bit more?

B: Yes a little but it’s not just parents, I think parents get a lot of the blame for everything and schools and communities and policy makers can all embed play more into people’s lives

A: The simplest way to do it is – I mean I know for my particular area traffic is a big concern and that’s why I’m not happy to let my kids play outside on their own just yet, even though I’d love to. But I often find that what happens is once a few kids come out after school and the ice cream van’s been – which is an annoying time isn’t it, every day – you’ll get a group of kids and they’ll all congregate and it’s almost like you kind of assume the position of the team leader for the moment so that all the other parents go oh it’s ok they’re with Jeff and then maybe the next day it will be for your neighbour to kind of take that role, and you’re talking about a community where everyone can get together to ensure safe play, but the fact that they can still get out and that’s one really good way of doing it

B: Yes and if you’ve got that kind of community spirit it makes it feel safer as well so more people let their kids out and then it just becomes a virtuous circle because more people play because it’s safer so it becomes even safer so you know and that’s where we’d like to get to really

H: Ok it’s interesting stuff. And coming up in the rest of our program we’re talking further to Dr Amanda Gummer about the research from the British Toy and Hobby Association and Play England and we’ll be hearing her suggestions for getting your children playing more and we’ll be answering your questions live here in the studio

Break

H: Well today we’re talking about how to get your kids out playing more, playing in the house, just getting them away from the telly really. Amanda let’s take a look at this research that was done, just how serious are the implications for our kids if they don’t have enough play? What sort of long term effect does that have?

B: I think the biggest two effects are lack of social skills and lack of creativity. Kids play because that’s what they do, that’s how they make sense of the world, and if you deprive them the opportunity to play either because you’re over-scheduling them or you’re not letting them choose what they do or you’re not letting them outside, and they don’t get those chances to develop, there is an argument that says – or there is a fear – that they will not develop the skills they need to be fully functioning, you know social, responsible adults

H: Right. So it can have a massive knock-on effect for their sort of mental development

B: Yes and there’s things like attachment and making friends and relationships and understanding how all that works – they need lots of practice at that, we’ve got lots of adults who don’t do that so well, so you know we need to help our kids do that from as young an age as possible and they get that from playing with other kids, learning what hurts, what doesn’t, learning how to take risks, how to assess risks, how to manage those kind of interactions with other people, and even things like arguments and play fighting, if you let the kids do it, they draw their own lines most of the time and they don’t push it too far. There’s a piece of research that says you know if they’re still friends at the end of it it’s just play fighting and actually that’s really good. Boys learn a lot of social skills by a bit of rough and tumble, and a lot of mums particularly but you know childcare professionals and teachers and everything clamp down on that and those boys then get labelled as badly behaved and actually what they’re doing is they’re learning how the world works and that’s really important stuff for them to learn

H: Yes like lion cubs really aren’t they – rough and tumble

B: Yes absolutely

H: But what were the actual recommendations from this report then that the expert play panel that the BTHA and Play England conducted – what were the actual recommendations?

B: Play is really important and should be prioritised. It’s not about any particular one type of play, it’s about healthy play, diets and moderation and everything, so we’re not demonising any sort of one type of play, and that governments and communities and schools and childcare professionals all need to recognise the importance of play, not just because it develops skills for later life but because that’s part of childhood and it’s part of the essence of being human, and actually why else are we – what are we trying to get from our kids if they’re not having fun?

H: Yes exactly, but it is difficult for parents isn’t it, I mean Jeff you’re a single parent, you’ve got two boys, two very active boys by the sounds of it, it is difficult if you’re a single parent, you’re in a flat, you’re stuck in a flat an in inner city somewhere, it’s hard isn’t it because there’s so much to do all the time, to actually find that time for your kids. What’s your advice?

A: Just sit out some time, I think if there’s 3 or 4 hours in between the end of school and them going to bed if you kind of dilute yourself with all the jobs you’ve got to do and the kids haven’t really got anything from you, whereas if you say ok out of those 4 hours, 3 hours of them I can be getting on with stuff, but one hour, solitary hour I’m going to be completely focused on the children and do nothing else then that is enough

H: Yes

A: That literally one hour is enough for them per day, then the rest of the time they’ll go off and play a game on their own but they’ll be so grateful for the fact that you’ve sat down, taken the time, and they enjoy that, you can see the joy on their faces, and can certainly see it in mine

H: Well all interesting stuff isn’t it, well perhaps this would be a good time to take some questions from our viewers we’ve had quite a few in. First one from Danielle in Brentwood, for Jeff – “how do you find time to be active with your kids? What type of activities do you do as a family? So we’ve kind of covered that but how do you find time to be active, what type of activities do you do?

A: Make time, well my favourite word in the whole word is “balance” because I do work a lot but I make sure that that balance, that the children don’t go without, that they see me enough. They don’t have to have me in their pockets every two seconds of every day. So when I am at home and I do pick them up from school, a routine is good and I particular think a routine is good, as important for the children as it is for the parents

H: Yes

A: So you know from home at the moment the weather’s good so we’ll cycle home for starters, good bit of exercise for them and it’s fun. So we’ve got home, we’ll crack off the homework, get that done, and then we’ll sit down and play. Examples of what we do – we – Bobby loves his football, in particular moments he’d be very disappointed if each day didn’t sort of encompass some kind of kick about

H: Yes

A: Freddy’s far more creative, like he loves his Hama beads

H: Oh yes

A: I know they’re a bit girly and he’ll probably –

H: No it’s not girly, it’s fine

A: Hate this later on, but no he likes to – well he doesn’t do the ironing over them obviously, I do, but he makes some wonderful little patterns, he loves the drawing

H: They’re great actually aren’t they?

A: And they both love reading, they’ll both actually quite happily sit there and even though it’s nothing to do with homework and read 20 minutes of one of their Harry Potter books or Horrid Henry or something

H: You’ve done really well to get your boys to read because it is quite a hard task sometimes, so that’s great, well done you

A: Can be but they’re surrounded by books, I think that often helps, and they like a trip to the library as well, that’s always encouraged them. And as well you go into sort of toy stores and what I found to be an amazing back-up to the homework that they do and the work at school is there’s these maths and English books that look to the kids that actually they’re just fun, they’ll sit there for a half hour and they’ll sit there doing it and all they’ve done really is done extra homework

H: Yes

A: To them it’s a game, it’s fun and they love the fact that daddy comes over and gives them the gold sticker that comes with the book to say well done you got that page completely right, so there’s a million things you can do

H: Yes you’ve just got to put your mind to it and if you go to the website then there are plenty of ideas on there actually aren’t there though

A: I like the unique ones, the individual ones that people have made up, they’re the ones that I particularly enjoy reading because that’s - the parents’ imagination because we’ve all got one but sometimes we kind of leave them in our childhood and think that you know that’s that, but as a parent it’s our job to kind of – it’s good for us to be as creative and imaginative as we can be as well

H: And it’s often simple things but you’ve just got to think of it in the first place haven’t you?

A: Do you know what I’ve found if someone says one word then if I say “football” then Bobby’ll say “ball” then Freddy will say cricket and it will go on and on and on

H: Oh I see. They’re good for the car as well those kind of games aren’t they?

A: Yes

H: Ok another one of your questions, Karen from Cornwall “I often struggle with finding time to create imaginative games for my child. How can I be more creative?” Amanda, any tips?

B: Well that’s sort of building on what Jeff said, but actually the kids will be creative, you don’t need to do it all for them, that’s part of the problem – part of the point of the research is that let kids be creative, don’t feel like you have to have scheduled every time, every second of their day – they don’t have to have quality time with you all that much, you can give them some prompts, you can say what about...have you thought of... but actually if you tend to give a kid an idea they’ll got “mmm actually what I wanted to do was” – it’s just a trigger

H: Yes

B: And actually then their creativity is what we’re trying to encourage

H: Yes. And It’s not all about money is it?

B: Not at all

H: Because you know people sort of think that you have to take your kids out to play centres but you don’t do you, you get a load of old rubbish, stick it together, make a model, it doesn’t cost anything something like that does it?

B: Yes – trip to the park

H: Yes. Okey doke. Some other question in from Clare Dart in Hastings – “can you give me some examples of activities I can do with my children?” That’s a bit of a big question really isn’t it?

A: Yes

B: Go to the website, there’s loads on the website, Facebook and the maketimetoplay.co.uk website, both got really good ideas, but just let them choose. Sometimes – and if – one of the things we find sometimes is that kids have big playrooms full of lots of toys, and they’re bewildered by the choice

A: Why not after school today let them build – let them bring all the duvets and the pillows and the cushions from all the sofas – let them create a little bit of mess, but just pile them up in the living room and let them jump off the sofa onto them and they’ll do that for hours

H: Yes. Build a tent with a chair in the middle

A: Literally hours, job done and there you go

H: Okey doke. Another question in – ah another one for Jeff, what’s your best advice for bringing up boys? I have two boys and was told that boys need walking everyday”, a bit like a dog. Is that true?

A: Very much so yes they need feeding like dogs as well, God they go through some food! Just to reiterate what you said with regards to the play fighting, I think my biggest bug bear is when they go at each other, and if I haven’t put something in front of them or if I haven’t said right this is what we’re up to or this is your time to play, then they need a bit of direction, boys, basically, and when they get at each other that’s when I particularly start to pull my hair out so advice for bringing up boys that are so close in age would be to – as much as you say be as off the cuff is what I often find, for me personally it helps to have a little bit of a plan, and they will go off and they will entertain themselves even if need be and that should always be encouraged, but if I know what we’re doing and where we’re going, they just kind of like to know what the plan is a little bit

H: Yes that’s a good tip actually, giving them some structure and then let them weave their way through it. Ok final question from Emma in Carlisle, “what are the long term effects of the lack of play?” Amanda briefly

B: I think lack of creativity, lack of imagination and lack of social skills and you do run the risk of exacerbating any potential mental health issues that you’ve got – I think depression, and isolation and all those kinds of things that we worry about our kids developing later on in life, play is a really good buffer against those. You can’t – I’m not saying it will never happen but the skills that you develop through play really help form attachments, increase confidence, self-esteem, self-image, all of that kind of stuff, and that’s all really positive stuff for mental health later on

H: Ok, interesting. We’ve got time for just one last question we want to squeeze in actually, there’s a child whose 11, they have attachment disorder and they never want to share their toys – how would you tackle that, trying to get them to play with another person? Amanda, this is definitely one for you!

B: It’s always hard doing specifics on something like this without knowing the background

H: Yes

B: And because there may be underlying conditions that prevent the child from you know – autism and Aspergers syndrome can be particular challenges, but generally if it’s just a kind of – an 11 year old who struggles to share, who struggles to relate to other people, it’s a gently, gently – you’re not going to get kids who’ve spent 11 years being fairly isolated and solitary and not interacting, suddenly becoming little miss popular, but gently gently, leading by example, making sure that as a parent your needs are met, so that you’re feeling confident and reassured and you’re able to communicate properly and I think sort of providing some prompts and some props for the child to interact a bit more and so there’s more turn-taking games and there’s just a framework to support her development in that area, that would be the sort of basic start, but like I say it’s very difficult to give advice on specific cases without seeing the child

A: And I’m not an expert but I would just wonder whether it would work to have duplicate toys obviously if the child has just got one and there’s a carbon copy sitting there whether he or she would be happier to share that additional one with the playfriend

H: Yes simple but could be really effective couldn’t it?

B: But also kids shouldn’t have to share everything because there are things, you know the special thing that they sleep with, they have a real attachment to that and forcing children to share everything of theirs isn’t necessarily good for them, but you now there’s a balance and if they’re working together with say construction toys or role play s tuff and everybody gets a turn –those kinds of toys and those kinds of activities can really help develop the skills necessary to then maybe share a favourite doll or maybe share a bike or whatever it is that they’re struggling with

H: Ok well it’s really interesting subject this, isn’t it? Jeff thanks so much for coming in

A: Thank you

H: It’s been an interesting insight into your life actually so it’s interesting to know how people cope with boys because I’ve got a girl so I don’t really know. And Amanda thanks very much to you, you’ve got two girls so you’ve got your work cut out I’m sure. Well certainly we are out of time and my thanks to Jeff and Amanda for joining us and my thanks to you for all your questions today, and if you want to get your kids out and playing this summer, you can go to the website which is www.facebook.com/maketimetoplay and there are lots of tips there from the experts, lots of ideas as to how to get your kids out playing and remember it does them good but it also does you good too. Thanks very much for watching and we’ll see you next time. Bye bye

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