Host: Janice Vee (JV)

Guests: Sarah Hedley (SH)

JV: Hi everyone, and no, don't worry, you haven't stumbled on an Open University maths programme, there is a reason why this formula is up here on this screen and I'll be telling you that very shortly. I'm Janice Vee and welcome to the Webchat today, thanks for joining us. According to researchers at Cardiff University and a team at Mates Intensify they've come up with a formula when everyone will be able to work out when their sexiest time of day is. Apparently to the nearest fifteen minutes! Joining me in the studio I have sexpert Sarah Hedley and she will be revealing this formula and telling us what we can do with our peak time of day. Jayne's sent in a question, "This formula sounds totally wacky, how did the idea to research this come about?"

SH: Mates Intensify came up with idea because they wanted to further their brand and create something that would please all of the people all of the time, so the first point of call was to find out when everybody felt sexiest, and that was why this was invented.

JV: Do you know when your time is?

SH: I have worked it out with the equation and my time is 6am.

JV: Not too bad, because I have a feeling everyone's going to be morning time.

SH: I think morning is a popular time, and that's due to hormone cycles, so it isn't any surprise to me that more and more people are coming up with the morning time. But we're all different, so it does vary.

JV: Well Brian wants to know how the formula works. He hasn't given us any information about him, so it's probably best to try on me!

SH: OK.

JV: I have an idea when my sexiest time is, but I won't tell you yet.

SH: I'll point out what everything means. You have to be really honest. Firstly you have to admit how many units of alcohol you'd have in a week.

JV: I'd say about 5, between 5 and 10.

SH: We have to divide that by the time that you most prefer. So are you a day person or an evening person?

JV: Evening. When it's a bit dark.

SH: So that becomes a 2. So 10 divided by 2. Plus ten, times by your age.

JV: Do I have to tell you the truth? 37.

SH: We're going to divide that by sexual frequency. How many times a week do you have sex?

JV: Between 4 and 8. Usually the lower number though.

SH: OK so divided by 4, times gender, which is 1.5 for female, 2 for male, so that's 1.5 for you. Then you divide that by 60, and you come up with a number. So yours is 34, a positive number, so we have to add 34 hours to 6am. So that's 4am for you.

JV: Not far off what I thought actually.

SH: If you go to the website you can work it out. A lot of the time your perfect time to have sex for your body isn't the right time for your life, because you'll be at work or you'll be getting the kids to school or you'll be doing the shopping. Something will get in the way of good sex. What happened with this, is we moved forwards with this and developed a gadget in the form of a gel for a guy or a girl so they can synchronise their sex drives. Over 90% of couples have mismatched libidos, so it's a really common problem. A small percentage will be lucky.

JV: Michael wants to know, "Why is there a difference between men and women? Surely it depends on the person not the gender?"

SH: Sex drive is linked to hormones and men and women have different hormone levels which is why we have very different hair patterns on the body, different voice levels. It's all linked in with hormones, which control our sex drive. That's not to say that all men have high sex drives and all women have lower, it's just different.

JV: As a nation we're getting a lot sexier aren't we? We're thinking more about sex, and just looking at these products here, you can buy them over the counter. You'd never normally, say ten years ago, been able to see these on the counter. We've got stimulating gel and condoms from Mates Intensify.

SH: Yes, they're all on sale in Superdrug, which is brilliant. It's amazing that the taboo around sex toys has gone and we're moving forward about and being grown up about it. Sex isn't something to snigger about anymore.

JV: Just for instance, this vibrating condom ring, which I won't take out. Just quickly Ben says that according to your calculator my time should be 4pm not 4am. When is yours Sarah?

SH: 6am. I had Mates Intensify work it out for me as my maths isn't very good, sex is more my area of expertise.

JV: See I thought it was morning.

SH: Is that not because it's more convenient for you?

JV: Not at all, no. I don't think so.

SH: Because my whole sex drive completely changed when I changed jobs. When I was working from home and I had that freedom of when I would have sex, now I do working hours so I'm very restricted. The time that I have sex is generally after 11pm, but it's not when I would most like to. So we can get into a bit of a rut of doing it when your partner is available and you're not at work.

JV: Well Lauren has sent in a question, she says, "Is it possible to not have a sexy time of day?"

SH: I think it's possible on some days. All of us feel sexy at times, and if we're not feeling sexy, and I've never heard of anyone not feeling sexy EVER, I'd give some counselling! Someday if you're ill or taking medication, the contraceptive pill can kill of sex drive, there's all sorts of pressure factors that can knock out your sex drive.

JV: Natalie says, "How can I work out the sexiest time of day for my partner?"

SH: Log onto www.matesintensify.co.uk and go through the equation, and you'll find it.

JV: Is it quite easy?

SH: Yes, it's much easier on the website.

JV: Does it go through the stages?

SH: Yes, it's all explained and it shows you how to do it. It's really easy.

JV: Hopefully you'll be able to link the two times of day then.

SH: Once we did this equation and found that lots of people had mismatched libidos, then we've gone forward and created this gadget for the guys and this gel for the girls. If she's not feeling sexy, it's a shortcut for her to, and if he's not then this ring will make him perform. So for either sex there is an answer. We're saying we can do something about this.

JV: Jake's sent in a question, "I just worked out my sexiest time is 3am but I'm normally asleep. How can this be right?"

SH: Of course it can be right! Guys are very sexual in their sleep! It can be possible.

JV: What can he do? Can we change our sexiest time of day?

SH: There are props we can use. Again this goes back to the gadgets and toys. Flirting with your partner.

JV: I was thinking more like diet and exercise.

SH: I think aphrodisiacs are largely placebos. If you wanted to change your diet to improve your sex drive you'd need to take the Gillian McKeith route, very organic and wholesome foods. No fads or gimmicks, just a healthy diet.

JV: Does that increase your libido?

SH: Oh yes. The right minerals. Zinc. All the different things that you need for a healthy diet.

JV: It's a lot of hard work.

SH: Yes, if there's a little on button that's going to do that for you, then by all means go for it. And sex is really healthy! You can start with the sex and let that be your exercise routine.

JV: Tony has sent in a question, he says he feels sexy more than just once a day, several times a day! Does the formula accept this?

SH: Yes, totally. This is just your optimum physical performance time.

JV: Pippa wants to know, "According to your formula, me and my boyfriend have different sexiest times by 13 hours. Is our relationship dead?"

SH: No, their predicament is really common. Both parties have to be prepared at evening out the imbalance. If one partner is saying they don't feel like it for a month, then the other person feels like it every day, then that will lead to problems. But if you're going to experiment with toys and sex moves and the person with the lower libido wants to think about ways to turn themselves on, erotic fiction, watching films, loads of different ways. Then they're making an effort. They're communicating at the same time.

JV: 13 hours is a lot!

SH: Yes, but you'd be surprised how many people are in the same boat.

JV: Does it happen that you end up having the sexiest time of day the longer you are together?

SH: You can get into a rhythm.

JV: Richard says, "I don't usually feel sexy when this formula says I should. Am I putting too many units of drink into it or is there just something wrong with me?"

SH: I think he may be putting too many units of drink into himself by the sounds of it! Alcohol is great in small doses. A little bit more can help you loosen inhibitions but then as a nation we tend to go too far, drink too much and especially or guys in tends to have a bad effect on them.

JV: Some people feel they need to drink more to lose their inhibitions but in fact has the reverse result.

SH: If you're a guy it can stop you performing entirely, then the next time you'll have anxiety about performing. It's a vicious circle. Try doing two weeks of not drinking.

JV: Maz says, "My husband and I are trying for a baby, usually when she's ovulating is her sexiest time but not always. Is there a way to find your sexiest time and get pregnant at the same time?"

SH: It's day 13 or 14 or your cycle usually. Sometimes we flirt more and women will wear shorter skirts and display obvious mating and attracting behaviour, but it isn't necessarily a link to our sex drive. Some people say that women prefer sex when they're menstruating because they feel more, they are more sensitive in that area.

JV: Well try the formula and see if it works for you! Now John Richards has sent in a question, he says his wife is 51, he's 53, his sex drive is very high particularly in the mornings but any time of day will do. His wife though is very tired in the mornings and also in the evenings. She does tell him that she frequently feels frisky in the day but she's at work at those times. Any suggestions?

SH: Well she needs to make that friskiness last from when she feels it in the afternoon. Maybe they have email, she could send him one to tell him what she's going to do to him later to try and make it through to home time. Rather than go home and have a glass of wine so that when you get to bed you're too tired, get home and tear each other's clothes off! Although it might feel a bit forced and staged at first you will get into it.

JV: Follow-up question from Jo da Siva, she's about to start working for a new company and her sexiest time is 3pm. Do you have any tips on how she can contain herself?

SH: I don't like the idea of having to contain yourself, so if there is somewhere private that's fine but if there is nowhere then schedule some nookie in for immediately after work!

JV: Or lunch time?

SH: Yes, if you can afford the hotel bill! At least once a year.

JV: Not in the toilets though please. Especially not in the office! Roy's sent in a question, like most men he feels randy early in the morning, how can he feel different at other times?

SH: Health can be a thing here, guys will often be in the morning because their testosterone will rise then. The ring would be a good thing, it blocks blood and can maintain his manhood during a session. You can buy this at Superdrug, it's like buying condoms. There is no stigma or taboo attached. You buy it in a packet with a condom, just as you'd buy a pack of three normally.

JV: It's quite interesting that they've done this, because as we're getting more adventurous we're needing more stimulating toys.

SH: Yes, because once you realise the benefits of what this little gadget can do, then there's a call for more. It's very healthy. Sigourney Weaver said an orgasm a day is the best way to keep healthy.

JV: Boy George said he'd prefer a cup of tea! Christophe wants to know, he's French and wants to know it applies to him or only people in the UK?

SH: It applies to everybody! Including French people.

JV: It's interesting that they've spent all this time to come up with this equation.

SH: Well, sex is such a cornerstone in most relationships, it can be a real make or break thing so it's really important. It was overlooked in the past, but now everyone can talk about it, and say how can we make it work? It's a key to a long-term relationship.

JV: Alan says, "Do you have any other formulas that might help me find a partner in the first place?"

SH: I don't have a magic formula but I just think being polite, courteous, and grooming is important. And get yourself out there! If you're not in, you can't win.

JV: And maybe finding out when his sexiest time of the day is and going out at that time. Could be giving out pheromones! Now Cliff says, "How exactly do you become a sexpert?"

SH: I'm a sex writer. I started as sex editor on Maxim, so ten years of research there. I started without knowing very much, but I've been talking to doctors and doing research. I have a book coming out too, called ‘Sex By Numbers', which is a kind of amalgamation of everything I know.

JV: So anyone can become a sexpert?

SH: If they've got ten years to spare! And they have the dedication.

JV: Tracy has sent in a question, "Have you got any tips as to how I can make the most of my peak time?"

SH: Yes. You can use the gel. To turbo charge you!

JV: This is just for women?

SH: Yes. Over 70% reported that it had increased sensation. 10% actually had their first multiple orgasm using the gel. So it's would be a good way! With gels and lubricants are great, apply them slowly and seductively and massage. Don't just slap it on!

JV: How do people get over the embarrassment?

SH: Say, oh I was watching a Web Chat or I read a magazine and saw this and it sounds interesting, what do you think? Have you done it with past partners? Try not to be too confrontational, saying I want to do this, because that can be quite scary.

JV: Because it could be quite hard.

SH: Yes, but it's fun and it's not painful or scary and you don't have to be a sex guru to use them. You're exploring together so it's quite simple. It's very couple friendly and gentle. So just suggest.

JV: Gorman has sent a question, he says, "Have you found out when the UK's friskiest time of the day is? Are we divided down gender or regional lines?"

SH: We're more divided down gender. Womens times are completely random across the whole spectrum. Guys are more focused in the morning. That correlates with their hormonal cycle, which is a 24 hour cycle. Women's cycle is over the month, so the time of day varies. If you go into a relationship thinking that you're going to have perfectly matched libidos, you're dreaming. You need a few props, few toys and to be able to talk about it.

JV: We aren't machines! Surely we can't be that predictable?

SH: No, it could change, but all your variables will change too. Have a look on www.matesintensify.co.uk we're also doing a sex poll, to find out what we should make for every yet. It's going to be the biggest sex poll in the whole of Europe.

JV: Thanks for all your help Sarah. And thanks for all your questions. Some were silly, some were great, but join us again next time.